Sunday, July 29, 2012

I am Other

Laying here in bed listening to my family live life. I get the occasional drive-in nursing from DD. Get to sniff a baby head. Even she is sick of Mama needing to sleep. She wants no part of this extended nap time.

I am working this weekend which means Friday I am up till BD arrives home then, nap till time to go. I am lucky. My babies have BD. They get a loving parent on the weekends when Mama works. Sleep deprivation is not as bad and work is less work when I get sleep. But oh the cost. My heart aches each time my LO comes in seeking my love and time and gets redirected with "mama needs to sleep," walking away quietly defeated. As the weekend progresses Ninja baby skills kick in and stealth drive by Mama visits occur. Mama see this & Mama I love you. In half sleep world I hear them. Baby girl wanting only milk now and then the arms of daddy for comfort, instead of sleep nursing. DS still trying. He tries to understand and comply. He will put his foot down when BD goes to work and insist on staying home with Mama Monday even though there is only a grouchy shell of me left for him. Work on Monday, then the fight on Tuesday to see if he wants to go to Mamoo's so I can sleep, a little. Last time, I just gave in and had him stay.

I won't MAKE him go. I cannot bring myself to force him away. I love them more than air. I am just one of those working Others.


Today I am..... Mother.




Friday, July 27, 2012

Olympic (M)Others


When I thought up this blog, this was what I was thinking about in some ways.

Moms being people, while being moms.

Some moms manage to be extrodinary people. Some moms are extrodinary just getting up everyday and being moms.

I hope to write more about this.

What do you think?

Today I am a..... Nurse.

Friday, July 20, 2012

(M)Other

My name is Trisha.

I feel like I have something to say. 

Doesn't everyone?

I am stubborn, full of myself, believe I am almost always right and have little patience for folks afflicted with "the dumb."

On another note, I think I am pretty compassionate. I really care for others and animals and the earth.

I am a 30 something, pushing 40, married by the grace of the government, slightly neurotic, horrible housekeeper with Martha Stewart-esque OCD aspirations, reasonably fluffy, pagan, feminist, bi-sexual, pro-choice, peace loving, nap taking, woman with continuously varying shades of red hair and glasses. I am a nerd. I am a nurse. I work at night. I am Mama to my wonderful loving cats. They are my life. I will always like them more than you, so get used to it and everything will be okay.

Then I became a Mama to Wolfgang in 2008 and Kitty arrived 2012. They are made of Awesome... most of the time. I love them. Always. All the time. ;-)

I then became a Lactavist, Intactavist, Cloth Diapering, Sort of Crunchy, Recovering Poorly Parented Child; striving to gently parent my own children, even Crazier Feminist, Co-sleeper, even More Deeply Neurotic Mama who is just trying to "Do Better" in the "No do-overs" situation that is bringing up baby people.

I found myself too late, I think. I wandered and didn't even get to have fun because I wasn't even aware of the wandering. I thought I was headed somewhere. Somewhere, where I needed to keep my nose clean to get to. Ha, little did I know.
I graduated with a degree in nursing June 2005 and I began my career as a Registered Nurse in a Pediatric Emergency Department. I worked there for 5 years and now work in Adolescent Psych. I hope to continue my education in Nursing in Women’s Health. Someday, I hope to become a IBC Lactation Consultant. Most of the time I am just really tired.

I have lots of interests, dreams and opinions. I feel like I found myself too late and am in a hurry to catch up. I am working on that too (either catching up or letting go). I hope to regain my spiritual side while maintaining my drive to reach my dreams. If I remember to I work on finding balance in my life. I hope to find some soon :-)


I have kind of conflicting wants.

I want to live simply but have stuff. I want to grow my own food, but not have to hoe the garden. I want to run an animal shelter and a women’s clinic. I want to throw pottery and fire it in my own kiln. I want to learn to blow glass.

I want to speak to the God and Goddess personally. I am not a furry but I love to wear my cat ears. I am hugely messy but anally organized (in my head LOL). I want help, but I must do it all myself. I am a horrible procrastinator but hate to be rushed.

I am always late. I hate violence. I get angry and shout a lot. I am strongly introverted but unabashedly blunt and open about my life. I am a horrible hypocrite and also a devoted follower of my own strict set of guidelines. I have a hard time making and keeping "In Real Life friends." I am awkward and weird.

I think I am no different than everyone else but at the same time extremely odd. I am me. Some people don’t like it, some people do.


How many roles do you roll with? What is your title today?

 

Today I am a...    Blogger.